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Post by Stephen on May 20, 2010 14:14:12 GMT -5
Well, I made it! Juice is gone and I feel REALLY bad about that because he was counting on me. However, it had to be done eventually. I hope he wasn't referring to me about the one person he won't vote for, but if that's the case, then so be it. I'll manage.
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Post by Stephen on May 20, 2010 14:15:15 GMT -5
And also, just throwing this out there... I started thinking about how difficult it will actually be to earn final votes over some of these people. With how clean Tom has played, I don't know if I can beat him! So, do I stay true and prove my loyalty with him and risk losing in the end, or do I make a move before then? Tough decisions.
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Post by Stephen on May 21, 2010 0:08:10 GMT -5
NEXT TO TOM ON THE CURRENT LEADERBOARD = MAD CRAZY <33333333.
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Post by Stephen on May 21, 2010 2:41:19 GMT -5
Wow... Wow... WOW.
The game has reached a new level of intensity. Anything can happen right now! The level of uncertainty is huge and the nerves are shaking!
Erin and Jordan receiving self-votes is a huge curveball for my initial plans coming into this round. Because I had faith in the 6 heroes to stick together, I figured we could split our votes 3-3 against Jeffrey and Hooker, and as long as neither of them won immunity, we knew only one could play the idol. I couldn't have been more wrong.
Tucker was acting extremely weird earlier... Jordan and I both noticed it. He seemed really surprised, and even angry that we voted Juice out. He wondered why we weren't sticking to the "Final 6 agreement" ... Well, there must be some kind of miscommunication. I NEVER said my actual intentions were joining up with any of the villains. I was under the impression that the goal was to make the villains feel safe so nothing crazy would happen, but that we were sticking true to the Heroes to the end. Tucker apparently isn't feeling that way, and it's very unfortunate. We have such a perfect opportunity to prove that Good > Evil, once and for all, and now it is getting ruined again. All game, Tucker has been claiming he'll be happy to see any hero on top. It sure isn't showing by his actions right now.
To make matters worse, now Erin and Jordan have self-votes. That leaves only me, Tom, and Morgan with votes that will count at the next tribal council. Tucker told me he thinks it's smarter for him to join with the person who has the "power" (AKA the Hidden Idol), so I am now almost sure he will be voting against a hero this round. If Jeffrey and Hooker have Tucker, the best we can hope for is a 3-3 tie if myself, Tom, or Morgan get their votes. If Erin or Jordan get their votes, they are toast. There is absolutely nothing we can do to stop that from happening, and that is a horrible feeling! It's really only the second time I felt I was in the minority this entire game. (The first time being on the 2nd Villains tribe when we first switched).
It would seem like the smartest move for them to vote Erin or Jordan off, but you never know. I still am not feeling safe. Earlier today, I went out of my way to apologize to Jeffrey for all the lying I felt I needed to do. He was livid with me... telling me he thinks all my lies were unnecessary and that I took it too far. Sure I may have gone a little over the line, but I still do believe I did the right thing playing along with the "Final 6 Alliance." When someone approaches you about an alliance, you don't ever say no! That immediately makes you the #1 enemy in their eyes. Just as Jeffrey claims he was pushed back into working with the villains, I was pushed into this Final 6 crap.
Jeffrey then accused me of trying to justify my actions, and I then reminded him my intent was to apologize (seeing as that's the first thing I said to him) because I do truly hate lying and playing dirty. However, in Survivor, if you want to win, you need to use strategy and make those difficult decisions. I've said it all games... strategically, we are all villains. That's part of being a good player! It's the way you act, and the way you value friendships and alliances that sets Heroes apart from Villains. Last round, and leading up to it, I was simply trying to make the best moves to ensure my own safety, and continue building up my shot at making it to the end of this game. Fine, if no one can respect that and value my passion for this game, then I won't win in the Finals. However, I know in the back of my mind those people would have done the SAME thing if they were sitting in my position. They are simply bitter about being outplayed and outwitted, and it's a shame they can't acknowledge smart gameplay when it ultimately defeats them.
Due to all this fighting with Jeffrey, I am still worried he may reeeeally want me gone. He may be willing to even try to Idol me out of the game, even though they have the votes to take out Erin or Jordan. It depends on how much he actually is against me. But, I am glad I stood up for myself and didn't let him walk all over me. That's just not how I roll. I can take care of myself, and I surely won't let some high school bitch hurt my feelings. Not gonna happen.
So, with all this, right now, the gameplan is simple. Win immunity! I need this BAD. I would feel much more confident in my ability to save Erin and Jordan if I just know I can't have the votes turned towards me. Hooker is suddenly the most important player in the game right now. Even after Juice's blindside, he has expressed interest in working with myself and Jordan. He does not want to see Jeffrey make it to the end since he knows he'll be slaughtered, and he's probably right. Jeffrey would likely beat all of us in the Finals, and he needs to go. This idol is such a pain in the ass, but if we can get Hooker onboard SOMEHOW, there is still potential to catch King Jeffrey with his panties down. I'll see what we can do!
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Post by Stephen on May 21, 2010 2:42:02 GMT -5
Oh boy, I think that may have broken my record for my longest confessional ever. Sorry. =\
BUT APPRECIATE MY DEDICATION PLEASE!
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Post by Stephen on May 21, 2010 2:46:11 GMT -5
Oh, and one thing I forgot is that Tucker left talking with me a little earlier tonight with a very stupid comment. He basically threatened me. I was asking him if he felt like taking Erin out would be smart to weaken her/Tom/Morgan (since Tucker told me he's worried about them)... He said that "It would be helpful to eliminate Erin now to clear up all the doubt about me and her," and that he'd "hate to see me get idol'd instead..."
Basically, since I wasn't born yesterday, I'm smart enough to realize that is a direct threat on me. Join up with me, or else you could easily be the one going home.
Fuck that. If you want to threaten me, I'm sorry, but you are not my friend in this game. Tucker is a traitor. At this point, I feel like it was a bad mistake not voting his ass out a long time ago.
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Post by Stephen on May 22, 2010 21:25:37 GMT -5
There's one thing I've learned about this game... it is dynamic, and every day presents new challenges.
The day after my big blowup with Jeffrey, we had a really nice talk for over an hour just about non-game stuff. And while that doesn't mean he's not still after me in the game, it sure can't hurt my chances that he maybe won't be as hardcore out for revenge on me. I know Jeffrey well enough to be sure he has talked LOADS of shit about all of us in his confessional because he's said to be brutal there, but I do think he's a cool guy. We do have nice talks, and I enjoy him being around. The reality is, I don't stand a chance against him if he's sitting with me in the finals, so he HAS to go soon. This idol is really screwing everything up.
Next, Morgan proposed the idea of giving immunity to Erin if me, her, or Tom wins. I think this would be awesome, except that I don't want to fuck myself over! We all know that giving immunity away has been some of the stupidest moves in Survivor history, and I don't want to repeat that history! I don't know if I feel safe enough to just give it up... Plus, doing that would CLEARLY point out that me/Erin are totally inseperable. Luckily, Tom has also told me he will not be giving up immunity if he were to win it. I think it may make us seem selfish since Morgan is so willing, but you have to look out for yourself! The reality is, Erin or Jordan will be leaving if Jeffrey, Hooker, and Tucker all vote together. We can't stop that. I want Erin to be here, and same with Jordan, but it's out of my control at this point. I need to assure my own safety. I wouldn't EVER expect Erin to give me immunity, and I hope she feels the same way. =\
Now, I'm just waiting on challenge results. I'm almost positive I won't win (since I always overthink challenges like this), so it looks like I'll be vulnerable once again. For my own sake, I should be hoping Erin or Jordan is the target. But my heart tells me to keep fighting to pull some move to save them both. It's just... what if playing super hard and trying to make that happen backfires and sends me home? Is it worth it? ... I'm not sure.
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Post by Stephen on May 22, 2010 21:28:17 GMT -5
Also, Tucker and I did chat a little bit this morning. He didn't seem to be in such a bad mood, and he told me there's some more problems with his lady. I feel horrible for him, and I do wish both of them the best!
Gamewise, I'm still so disappointed. I still feel a barrier up between us. I don't feel like I can talk to him like I did before he went to exile. Seeing him flop SO quickly just to go with "who has the power" makes me lose all trust in him. How am I supposed to know he wouldn't do the same to me if my ass was on the line? It's just sad when you connect so well with someone from Day 1, and suddenly, everything you built up is gone. That's how I feel right now. Sure, he can still salvage my trust and loyalty by voting along with us this round, but I think the chances of that happening are slim.
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Post by Stephen on May 22, 2010 21:40:42 GMT -5
I am literally SHAKING waiting for these results. Myself or Erin has won immunity! If I win, it's going to put me in a SHITTY position deciding if I give it away or not. I want Erin to just win to get it over with!
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Post by Stephen on May 22, 2010 21:45:55 GMT -5
NOOOOOOO!
THE ONE TIME I DREAD WINNING IMMUNITY, AND I WON.
NOW I HAVE THE MOST DIFFICULT DECISION EVER. SAVE A FRIEND (and risk my own life) OR RISK HER LEAVING?
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